Life Through Rose-Tinted Glasses

Are you sick of reading horrible stories in the news? Have you had enough of hearing about negative things that happen? Fed up with seeing nasty images or videos on-line? If the answer is yes, then maybe you need some rose-tinted glasses. My dad always jokes to me that I wear them all the time. I can help you get yours! Okay, I understand it’s easy sitting here in the sunshine with the birds tweeting to see things from a happier perspective, but that’s not always the case. In present times where we are having such doom and gloom rained down on us by the media how can we avoid it? There’s a well-known saying I love and it’s that a ship can’t sink unless it lets the water in. We have to let the negativity in before it can affect us. I’m not saying turn your back on things you wish to change because they are negative, because helping the cause that concerns you will help you feel accomplished and therefore make you happier. I find having a good clear out on social media sites helps, we all have those friends who moan about their lives when in reality their biggest problem is what to do for tea. Cutting out toxic people is a big step forward, people that make you unhappy or hold you back in any way are best out of your life. Refrain from commenting or reacting to horrible videos on-line, as all this does is pass it on like a disease, spreading around the internet for everyone else to see. Life’s much better when you focus on the positives, and believe you me I’ve had a lot of negativity to block out, however I have managed to focus on the good and life is rosy.

Life isn't perfect

As I was sitting on the sofa, browsing Facebook admittedly, Chase decided to run in with the pastry brush and a cupcake case shouting "mixy mixy mummy!" This in no uncertain terms means he wants to make a mess in my kitchen, how could I refuse? I thought I would kill two birds with one stone (I do wonder where this expression came from? Which psycho is going around killing birds with stones?) and looked for a simple recipe that I could share with you all afterwards. That's when I thought of those lovely, soft, melt in your mouth biscuits Viennese fingers. They only use five ingredients that most cupboards contain. Oh how I wish I had seen the carnage that was about to follow the crumbs, chocolate everywhere and a rather pathetic batch of failed fingers!

I won't be posting the recipe as it was rubbish, well maybe the recipe wasn't rubbish, it was probably something I did, but the fact is we all mess up sometimes and that's okay. It's even more okay to tell people that you did. In this day and age where everything on-line is portrayed to be perfect, I think it's refreshing to show the not so perfect side of things too. Maybe if we all posted a few of our mistakes, or not so flattering pictures, or shared how life was not as great as it looks to everyone, then the younger generation will learn that you don't have to be a supermodel, or own the most expensive things or indeed be happy all the time. There are days it's okay to look like you just got up all day, or walk around in old trainers or have a good cry, after all everybody does it. They just don't show you. I proudly share with you my mistake today and yes I failed at creating anything but crumbs, me and my son had a lovely morning together, we still ate them and they tasted lovely and I thought I would drink my tea out of the Christmas mug to prove life doesn't have to be perfect!

Cool to be kind

It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice. That’s one of my favourite quotes and how true it is. In a world where popularity is regarded as the be all and end all, the amount of likes you get determines your worth and having a massive amount of ‘friends’ on the internet makes you appear to be the coolest cat around. I quite clearly, am obviously not the coolest cat around, for having just used that phrase. How do we stop our children from believing this is how we make it in life? It makes me sad to think people would prefer to be well known than nice. The thought of them getting excited, because lots of people they don’t know want to be their ‘friend’ on the internet scares me. How can you teach your children to be kind? Is it something they just are?  My daughter Neve, told me about a girl at her school people had singled out because she was new. Neve said, she had told the girl she would be her friend, and she didn’t care if anyone else wouldn't talk to her because of it. Proud mum moment! I have never been a follower. I have always stood up for what I believe, even if that meant going against the grain, so I suppose leading by example is the best way. Focusing on the good things people do and acting really impressed when you see an act of kindness, will make them want to do it too! We really need to make it clear to our children it’s not how well known you are, but how kind you are that matters.

Birthday's on a budget

My son Chase on his 1st birthday

Nobody likes to think they're having to budget for someone's birthday, especially their own children's. Unfortunately in this day and age we haven't all got the funds to be buying our teenager, or indeed our 6 year old, the latest gadget. So how can we combat the feeling of guilt for not spending as much as the 'Jonses' up the road? Well, it's simple really, the gift of time is the one they will remember more than the latest fad, (that will probably be forgotten when replaced with the shinier newer version they year after.) I remember when my eldest, Olivia, was 6. I planned a cinema trip, something a lot of people do on a weekend for fun, however I told her we were going for a girly night out, just me and her. We spent the afternoon getting dolled up, doing our hair, putting lippy on and got in the car.

Olivia on her 6th birthday ready to go out

She was so excited, not knowing where she was going and that she was on a 'girl's night out'. I took her to Mcdonald's, which she was very happy with and then onto the cinema. We watched Shrek the 3rd, actually that's a lie, I watched Shrek the 3rd. Olivia thought when the adverts had finished it was time to go! She played musical chairs and asked constantly is it finished yet (maybe not the best of ideas!) But the point being, she still to this day (she's 14 almost 15 now) remembers our night out. Would she have remembered getting the pink Nintendo D.S she really wanted that I couldn't afford? Does she remember being disappointed she didn't get it? No. She just remembers the fun night out she had with mummy. I can guarantee you any moment you make special will be remembered and even carried on for generations to come. Try it when you are stuck for something to buy, even if it's because they have too much and you don't know what to buy them. You don't have to be skint to make memories, rich people can be happy too.....

My daughter Neve on her 4th birthday

Beat the January blues

My beautiful children and niece

Okay it's that time of year already, the Monday of months. January. After ramming adverts about luxurious food and drink down our throats for three months, now is the time we get made to feel like crap about it and told we now need to work it all off. It's a load of rubbish I say, be kind to yourself in January. Who says that just because Christmas has finished that the season of goodwill has to end? Or that we can't treat ourselves and have magical family times together? It's all up to you. Don't be made to feel bad by the latest celebrity that's lost a few pounds (and a few more with the help of photoshop!) If you really feel like you have over indulged and want to get back into shape then take small steps and make a few changes. Cut back on portion sizes, sugary treats and drink plenty of water. Take walks instead of driving, make it fun. Take a camera and snap everything red/ things that move/animals or challenge yourself by seeing how long it takes you to get somewhere and then try to beat it next time. The best thing is if you are feeling down because money's tight, or just because, then getting out in the fresh air is the best medicine in the world.

I love a walk on the beach 

If you have had a good clear out of the toys your children no longer play with, or clothes you don't need, why not sell them on a free site such as Facebook and then put the money in a family saving pot. When you reach a target amount do something together, go see a movie or a trip to the zoo? Buy one of those money boxes you have to open with a tin opener so you won't be tempted to borrow from it, they sell them in Poundland. Sit and plan 12 family dates for the next year, one for each month and then you will have something to look forward to. These don't have to be expensive they can be cheap or free, remember the breakfast picnic from my earlier post? Apply the same magic throughout the year as you do at Christmas it costs nothing. Just remember be kind to yourself, and others it costs nothing!